Should I block my ex?

Are you going through a breakup? Are you questioning whether to get back with your ex or if this time it really is the end? Are you worried about how you are going to get through this? Don’t worry, we have all been there. Getting into a relationship and going through a break up is something the majority of us will experience at some time in our lives – more in our adolescent lives. However, there is always one question that is raised straight after a breakup, a question that is more prominent in the digital world we live in, and that is should I block my ex?

In the world of social media that seems to rule our lives, we are provided with a platform that gives us an insight into the lives of those around and close to us without even having to leave the house. If after a break up you still have your ex on social media, or even have their phone number, there is always going to be that urge to contact them again, and it could lead to you getting back together with them. In most circumstances, this isn’t the best option for yourself.

There are many reasons that you should consider blocking your ex. However, as in every situation where you weigh the pros and cons of a situation, you must play devil’s advocate with yourself to ensure you are making the best decision for yourself. So, to start us off, let’s have a look at some reasons you shouldn’t block your ex.

You had a clean break up, and you still want to be friends.

In some breakups, it is just a case that a couple simply isn’t compatible to be a ‘couple’. However, this doesn’t mean you no longer get on with each other, as you may have had some good times together, but more in a friendly way. When it is a situation like this, this means you can still initiate a promising friendship and keep things civil between yourselves.

If this is your situation, then there seems to be no reason to block each other as you are on good terms, and even better you are in a position where you can be happy for each other.

You need time to figure things out

Again, there is a time in some breakups that it is simply the right person at the wrong time. It may have been when you were in the relationship together you were happy, but there was this feeling if you start to hurt each other this could lead to worse emotional turmoil, so it was time it came to an end. Once again, this doesn’t mean you are never going to get back together, but if you take the time away from each other to clear your heads and figure out what you want – both for yourselves and each other – then the higher the chance there is for the relationship working out.

You still want to give the relationship a try, but your ex needs to prove and show they are dedicated to the relationship

Your ex may be a genuinely thoughtful and caring person, but there may have been at times in your relationship that you felt they were distant and that they just weren’t as dedicated to the commitment as you were. This was perhaps what led you to breaking up with them in the first place. However, this doesn’t mean you have stopped caring about them or that you believe the relationship is over forever.

In situations like this, then you need to make it clear that if this relationship is really going to work, then it needs to be clear you are both dedicated to the relationship if it is going to work out and that it means both of you are happy. Once this is made clear to your ex and that it could potentially work out, then there is no reason to block them in this circumstance.

Reasons to block your ex

Now we come on the main reasons you should consider when it is really time to cut off all contact from your ex and most importantly put yourself first.

For your wellbeing and inner peace

The objective of a break up is you need to remove all the negative elements of what was in that relationship from your life and start to finally move on. Some of these elements may have been mind games and bad habits. If you continue to have access to some sort of communication or social media platform with your ex, then you are stopping yourself from thinking and putting yourself first as you are still prioritising the relationship.

You broke up for a reason, right? Then it is time to block your ex and allow yourself time to recover.

Your ex cheated

This one’s easy, block, now! Breakups hurt like hell anyway, when someone cheats this is honestly a killer. It’s the betrayal of the person you deeply cared for – and even loved – would choose to be with someone else whilst they are still with you. When you think of it that way, this should be an instant reader to block your ex because a person like that is not worth your time of day.

Your ex is trying to emotionally blackmail you

After a break up your ex may start to try and still communicate with you and start to tell you things like they are going to do something to themselves if you don’t get back together with them. This is something called emotional blackmail. It is a toxic trait that means a person is trying to tug at your emotional side in order to get what they want.

When a toxic trait like this starts to arise from your ex, it is time to block. Otherwise, they are going to get into your head, and things are going to become a lot worse for both of you.

Your ex is toxic

Toxic
Source: Sopranos Autopsy

This leads back to the previous reason, so there isn’t too much to say on this one. At the start of your relationship, your ex may have been charming and innocent, but the longer you were together you might have started to notice new traits arising such as they may have started to become more jealous, more possessive and controlling. This is a toxic person.

As with the emotional blackmail, its time to block them…

You need to stop the constant cycle of breaking up and getting back together

This is something that often happens when you keep in contact with your ex. At first, you break up, you keep each other on social media, you keep in contact and begin to feel that you have made a mistake, and this leads to your reunion. All is good (for about five minutes), and all of a sudden you are back at square one and you are once again crying because they have broken your heart once again.

This is when you need to press that block button and ensure you break this cycle so you can finally move on and stop yourself from getting back to that heartbroken stage again.

You need closure

single life post
Source: Women Working

Even if you have been through many breakups with your ex, there comes a time when you realise enough is enough, and it is finally time to move on. This is when the reason for blocking your ex is to give you that time to give yourself closure from that chapter in your life and begin the next one.

When you know its over, there is no going back, and you realise it is time to stop reliving the past. If you block your ex on social media, then you are not getting this constant reminder of updates of their life, and once again, you can start to move on and put yourself first.

Finally moving on…

Breakups are definitely one of the most heart-wrenching things you can go through in life – depending on the situation – and a way to get through them is to block your ex. So, if you are ever in a situation like this, just remember some of the reasons listed and remember to put yourself first.

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