The seven types of people you see in lectures

We’ve all been there before. It’s fifteen minutes into a lecture and there’s another forty five minutes to kill.

You’ve exhausted your social media and decide it’s time to begin scouring the room to see how your fellow students are getting along. Whether you’re doing classics or computer science, the types of people you find will always be the same.

1. The Online Shoppers

Perhaps the best kind of people to end up sitting behind. These are the people that decide it’s a valid excuse to ‘treat yourself’ by sitting in a lecture theatre alone. From ASOS to Missguided you start to discover aspects about this person’s identity despite only seeing the back of a head. You can’t help but get excited every time they finally decide to purchase an item, even though you’re slightly jealous you’re too skint to online shop yourself.

2. The Cougher’s

There’s always that one student who cannot take it anymore. Their eyes are filled to the brim and their throat is tingling to the point of no return. They bravely break the silence of the room, offering a five minute window for all other cougher’s to relieve their pain. Soon enough, the noise settles down, and the coughing game continues.

3. The Question Askers

Every time the lecturer offers the chance, these people raise their hands with no shame. Often you feel like you’re gate crashing a date when a single question turns into a full on conversation between the pair.

4. The Leavers

These people have no fear, leaving fifteen minutes before the lecture is about to end. Usually they’ve planned their leave perfectly, sitting at the end of the row waiting for their chance. They execute the walk of shame beautifully – not even a stare from a lecturer is stopping them.

5. The-Try Hards

The type of people who probably take painkillers in the advance of a lecture, just to ensure their neck cramp doesn’t get too severe. Their heads are buried in a mountain of notes and their hands are constantly gliding across the page with ease. These are the people who are most likely going to smash the exams, and even though we should be happy for them, we’d quite happily rip their notes to shreds.

6. The Sleeper

There are a variety of sleeping positions you can expect to find within the lecture theatre. Usually you’ll find the individuals who simply place their head back and fall asleep with a mouth wide open. Secondly you have the people who fold their arms into a pillow, ruthlessly using the desk to sleep. Finally you have those who fight their sleep, drifting away and waking up every other minute.

7. The ‘what just happened’ people

The type of people who have read this article and recognise every person fore mentioned. Once you’ve drifted for five minutes, there’s no going back. Usually you walk out of the lecture and ask your friends if they were also clueless, and unless you’re smart enough to be friends with the try-hards, the answer is most likely ‘yes’. You return to the good old phrase ‘we’re all in this together’. Besides, there’s always lecture capture.

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