Dealing with a breakup during exams? Here’s how to cope

Breakups suck at the best of times but dealing with a breakup and heartbreak during exams? Well, that’s tough. Perhaps, you and your partner grew apart or you realised that the timing just wasn’t quite right. Whatever the context, you probably want to curl up into a ball and listen to Taylor Swift songs on repeat right now. However, there are exams to study for and as awful as your breakup is, what’s even worse is letting your situation now affect your plans for the future. So, take a deep breath and read on to find out how to cope with heartbreak and deal with a breakup during exams.

Think about the long term goal and gain control 

Firstly, it’s important to think about the long term goal. Perhaps you thought that you and your partner would be together indefinitely. Who knows, maybe you will? However, nothing involving another person can ever be certain- because you cannot control the acts or emotions of someone else. In fact, the only thing that you do have control over is your response to the situation. Think about the reasons that you are studying in the first place and picture the lifestyle that you would want in the future (and remove everyone else from the equation.) By identifying the end goal, hopefully, you are able to motivate yourself to take the steps towards achieving it, thus gaining a sense of control in the process.

Delete your social media apps

It’s always a good idea to delete your social media apps when studying for exams however this particularly applies if you are going through a breakup. Social media is never going to be a positive outlet after a breakup as you are likely to resort to stalking your ex, obsessively waiting for a message or worse, messaging them. If you do want to contact your friends or loved ones try talking on text or Whatsapp instead.

Study in small blocks

An inability to focus is one of the things students who are dealing with a breakup and heartbreak during exams find difficult. Therefore, it is often helpful to work in small blocks of say, an hour. That way, you have some time to process your emotions and talk to friends and family. Then, you can log off and focus on revision for a short period of time, before allowing yourself some time to grieve again.

Make plans with friends and family

When dealing with a breakup or heartbreak (or both), it’s important not to isolate yourself. Remember that your mental health is even more important than exams. Therefore, it’s a good idea to try and arrange one social activity every day, be that a walk or coffee with friends or even just a catch up on the phone.

Get a change of scenery

Likewise, switching up your study space will help you maintain focus and stay alert. Try moving around in different rooms, going to cafes, friends’ houses or a library to study. Take regular breaks and enjoy your local walking routes to get some fresh air and reset! Exercising will also make you feel better and help you gain a sense of control.

Try not to obsess over the relationship

When thinking how to deal with a breakup during exams, try not to obsess. It’s easier said than done, when you’re going through heartbreak during exams or any other time. This particularly applies, if you were ghosted or the breakup came out of the blue. Remember that obsessing over what happened and replaying events isn’t going to give you any more clarity. It’s just going to distract you and make moving on that much harder. If you really do feel like you need clarity from your ex then you may want to consider reaching out. However, think long and hard before doing this and remember that you may not get the response that you want.

Get creative 

Getting creative is one of the best ways to focus the mind and switch off. If you are finding it hard to study then try doing some creative exercises like journaling or a quick drawing challenge on youtube before you start. Events like paintaway or brush party are great ways to express yourself in a social setting. Likewise, why not sign up for a life-drawing or pottery class with friends during the week. This will be a great way to distract yourself from your breakup and socialise without the need for alcohol. There’s no denying it, dealing with a breakup or heartbreak during exams is tough. It takes a lot of resilience and determination to get through it and focus on your studies when you want to do anything but. However, all you can do is try and distract yourself by focusing fully on the work that’s in front of you. Try to not be too hard on yourself, and if you need to take some time to mourn that’s ok. At the end of the day, all you can do is your best. Fed up of online dating apps but ready to meet someone new? Here’s how to meet someone without using an app.