Key Summary
FAQs
How can I cope with moving into student halls when I have social anxiety?
Make the move smaller and more predictable. Learn the building layout, join relevant group chats, plan a few simple introductions and give yourself private recovery time. You do not need to attend every social event. If social anxiety is having a major impact on daily life, the NHS advises seeking help because effective treatments are available.
Should I tell my flatmates that I have social anxiety?
You can, but you do not owe new flatmates a diagnosis or detailed explanation. Telling one trusted person that large groups or unexpected plans can be difficult may make things easier. You can also simply state practical preferences, such as needing quiet time or preferring advance notice before a large gathering.
How can I introduce myself to flatmates when I feel anxious?
Keep the first interaction small. Say hello, share your name and ask one easy question, such as what course they study or when they moved in. You do not need to create an instant friendship. Brief repeated conversations in the kitchen or corridor can feel more manageable than one intense first-night social.
Can hall group chats help with social anxiety?
They can help by making names and faces more familiar before meeting in person, but you do not need to follow every message. Mute a busy chat if it becomes overwhelming and use it for practical information or smaller plans. Be cautious about sharing private information in large unofficial groups with people you have not met.
What can I do if using a shared kitchen makes me anxious?
Start by learning when the kitchen is quieter and prepare simple meals until the space feels more familiar. Keep enough food available that one anxious evening does not mean skipping meals, but avoid withdrawing permanently if gradual use is possible. Small repeated exposures can feel more manageable than forcing yourself into the busiest time immediately.
Should I choose catered or self-catered halls if I have social anxiety?
Neither option is automatically better. Catered halls reduce cooking but can require regular dining-hall visits, while self-catered halls give more control over meal times but involve shared kitchens. Think about which environment is harder for you, visit accommodation if possible and ask about quieter rooms, flat sizes and available adjustments.
Is it okay to skip halls social events because of anxiety?
Yes, you do not need to attend every event, but complete avoidance can make your world increasingly narrow if anxiety is deciding everything for you. Choose smaller, manageable steps such as attending for twenty minutes or meeting one person first. The NHS suggests breaking challenging situations into smaller parts and working through them gradually.
What help can my university offer for social anxiety?
Universities may offer counselling, wellbeing appointments, disability or inclusion support, study adjustments and help communicating with accommodation teams. Services differ, so contact them early rather than waiting for a crisis. Social anxiety can affect presentations, attendance and shared living, making it useful to discuss both academic and accommodation difficulties.
When should I get professional help for social anxiety?
Seek help when fear of social situations is persistent, overwhelming or significantly affecting everyday activities, relationships, study or your ability to leave your room. The NHS says you can speak to a GP and can also self-refer to NHS Talking Therapies in England. Treatments include CBT, guided self-help and, in some cases, medication.
Can social anxiety get better while I am at university?
Yes. Social anxiety does not always go away by itself, but effective help is available. The NHS lists cognitive behavioural therapy as a main treatment, alongside guided self-help and other options. University can create difficult situations, but it can also provide structured opportunities to practise manageable social steps with appropriate support.
Moving to halls can be a daunting prospect. Moving to a new city, living away from home for the first time, lots of new people. This can be especially daunting if you have social anxiety. So, here is a guide on moving to halls when you have social anxiety, written by someone currently living in halls with social anxiety.
Group chats
This is a great way to meet people before you even step foot on campus. For me, I joined my hall group chat and my course group chat and I’ve made some great friends from both. It’s a good thing to do as it means that you won’t have as many awkward conversations when you first meet someone, and you’ll be able to recognise people from the chats, meaning you’ll already have something to talk about when you meet in person for the first time.
Put yourself out there
While this may seem counterproductive, putting yourself out there is the only thing you can do. You never know who you may meet. Joining societies, getting to know people in your course or from your hall can help to ease your social anxiety.
Check out this guide with some more advice on how to get past the awkward small talk when you first move to university.
…But know your limits
You don’t have to go to every social event. Prioritising yourself and your mental health is the most important thing, no matter what. If you’re in need of an excuse, saying that you’ve got work to do is a good one. Not only is it almost certainly true, but people will understand and you will be free to spend your time by yourself.
Stay in touch with people from home
It’s important to stay in touch with people from home. While it may make you feel homesick, maintaining those relationships with your family and friends is a good thing. Your friends from home, while they may not be going to the same university as you, will also be going through some of the same experiences, so keeping in contact with them will be good for your mental health and can alleviate some of the social challenges of university.
Self-catered advice
For your first year, your choice of accommodation is an important decision. Both catered and self-catered halls have their advantages and disadvantages when you think about it from the perspective of someone with social anxiety. You can read our full breakdown of catered vs self-catered accommodation here.
A benefit of catered accommodation is that you won’t be staying in a flat, so you will have your own individual space, away from other people. But, for meals, you will have to go to the dining hall, as you won’t have the space or the equipment to make your own food. The dining hall is can be a stressful place, let alone if you have social anxiety or not.
Then, with self-catered accommodation, while you won’t have to worry about the dining hall, you will have to deal with cooking in a shared kitchen, which can be stressful if you do not get on with your flatmates. Some ways to deal with this anxiety are to cook food that can be put in the oven, meaning that you won’t have to watch over it and risk running into one of your flatmates and having an awkward conversation. Alternatively, if your flatmates are constantly in the kitchen, having some snacks, ideally healthy, in your room can do the trick, so that your anxiety is not having as large of an impact on your physical health.
Living in halls can be stressful, there’s no doubt about that, especially when you have social anxiety.
While there isn’t anything you can do about your social anxiety, there are things you can do to alleviate the stress. Putting yourself out there when you feel up to it, talking to people you trust and most importantly, prioritising yourself and your mental health, can make the university experience as enjoyable as possible. Just remember, you got this.