By now everyone moving into university this year will be in their accommodation, and most likely have met some wild and wonderful flatmates already. So, here’s a roundup of some of my favourite stories about housemates who have been nothing but straight up odd.
Emily at Nottingham
We’re going to start with Emily, one of my brother’s friends and one of the first stories I ever heard about weird flatmates. Emily had a housemate in first year (who for reasons unknown) ate nothing but jam sandwiches, at least for as long as they lived in this flat. Now, I know what you’re all thinking, there is one very important question that we all want to know the answer to- what flavour of jam was it? Unfortunately, I do not have that information, nor do I know why he chose to do this other than I guess for the love of the jam sandwich to which I cannot blame him. Just to make this even less conventional, he kept both the bread and jam in his room, maybe the true reason why this was his food of choice was so he didn’t have to leave his room, but who knows.
Jess at Hull
Jess is my friend from my course at uni who I’ve never lived with, and honestly after hearing this story, I’m pretty glad about it. One of her housemates decides all forms of conversation should be held in interview like conditions. Now I respect the grind and let’s be honest, don’t we all kind of wish to have the full attention of the person we’re talking to at all times; but from someone who hasn’t gotten a single job where an interview was required I wouldn’t be holding my breath that they would like me.
Karelle at Hull
When in her second year at the University of Hull, Karelle had a new housemate move in halfway through the year who was in his 30s. Now anyone who’s ever been 21 will know how old 30 seems, but no, him being 30 is not why we spoke about him being odd- well not fully. When people go to university at 18 you somewhat prepare yourself that not everyone will be the best cook or cleaner from the beginning, however, I think it’s fair to say when a 30-year-old moves in with you, your expectations are slightly higher. Well, for Karelle they shouldn’t have been as this may have been the only 30-year-old on the planet who was unaware that you’re supposed to keep cream cheese in the fridge.
Matthew at Newcastle
Now this wasn’t Matthew’s flatmate but rather his next-door neighbour and after this interaction I imagine he was pretty relieved that that was the case. When you have a knock on you flat door late at night, I don’t think anyone expects it to be your next-door neighbour with a jug of custard asking to use your microwave- but when your microwave is broken where else are you supposed to do go with your jug of custard? However, the question of why his microwave was broken was soon answered as he decided this jug of custard required 10 minutes in the microwave: imagine how that went.
Anyway, after the custard explosion, he did what anyone in this circumstance would do – go and get more custard, before doing the exact same thing. And I mean, the exact same thing. So, after putting the jug of custard in the microwave for another 10 minutes and watching it explode, again; he went back to his own flat, to get more custard. Now luckily for Matthew, and luckily for custard boy, it was third time lucky. So now the custard is heated through and actually in the jug rather than splattered on the inside of the microwave you think it would be time for them to go back to their flat and eat their custard, but no, the surprises haven’t stopped yet as he invited Matthew over to his flat to show him his air rifle collection. So after all that, his custard ended up going cold before he could eat it and whether or not he ate it in the end is a question we’re all left with.
Kate at York
Kate was the girlfriend of one of my flatmates in first year and honestly it took me a while to realise that she didn’t live in Hull as she was there more than half the people who did live there; but after hearing her multitude of stories of people she shared a common area with I do not blame her. If anyone thinks they have bad luck with who they live with this year, keep reading because I can guarantee Kate will make you feel better. One of her flatmates had a love affair with a frying pan. Valid, there is no midnight snack quite like a steak but come on, we’re on a student budget here! Anyway, this boy’s love for his pan was like no over as he used to keep it on top of the cupboards just to ensure it stayed safe and got the respect it deserved.
Kate also had another flatmate who used a teapot and cup and saucer at every pre-drinks but as they didn’t go out out who could blame them for sitting and drinking tea, at least it’s sociable and they made an effort. That was the thought until one day Kate asked her and discovered it was not tea, but rather Kahlua mixed with milk. I don’t think any of us will know why this person decided to use a teapot and create more washing up for themselves- maybe they just wished to feel fancy or maybe they wanted to conceal what they were drinking but either way I for one, cannot say I’ve met anyone else who consistently drinks Kahlua from a teapot.
Anyway, that’s the end of weird housemates and for anyone who has an odd flatmate or two this year, don’t worry about it, and who knows, once you’ve gotten over their quirks you may become friends or you may build a Princess Diana shrine in your second-year house living room and become the weird flatmate yourself like I did.
The only picture I have of said shrine ^
Thanks for reading.